It was nearly 9:00 PM when I heard the phone ring in the office. We were just sitting down to eat dinner, so I didn’t answer. The voice on the answering machine explained that he was given my number by the humane society. He described, in great detail (until my answering machine flashed FULL when I got back to the office), that he had an Aussie-Blue Heeler mix that he described as “an excellent dog”. However, he added that he lived on a busy road and that the dog has begun acting out around people, including nipping folks who were passing by. He said he just cannot leave the dog alone. He stated, quite firmly, that most probably tomorrow they would euthanize the dog. He pleaded that I get back to him.
Although my gut told me otherwise from the first sentence that he uttered, I thought perhaps that his next words would be an inquiry on our training / rehabilitation services for his “excellent dog”. But, to the contrary he claimed that he just could not keep the dog any longer, and that it belonged on a farm away from people. He gave two phone numbers and then added another 45 seconds of testimony about how special the dog was. I could hear him choke up (and sense a welling up of tears forming in his eyes) when he said that he had a young child with Down’s Syndrome that absolutely adored the dog. He just wanted the dog to go to a good home, he said as his voice trailed off with what seemed to be very authentic emotion.
Let’s play a game of hypothetical questions: your two year old kid has developed a habit of playing in the road. What do you do? Your five year old has begun hitting school mates in her kindergarten class. What do you do? Your teenager stole your keys and took your car for a joy ride around the block. What do you do?
What the heck is wrong with people? We aren’t talking rocket science, here. How could his dog be nipping passer-byes if he managed it right? Do you manage your 2 year old kid so that he has access to play in the road? Do you not intervene with discipline and clear communication about standards for behavior when your child begins to play too roughly with others? Do you send your child to the gas chamber because he is testing his limits AND your patience as a parent when he takes your car around the block? Come on – take a bit of responsibility for your life and the things in your life for which you are responsibility.
I simply do not understand why people cannot put on their “let’s be reasonable” hat, plug into their “average level of intelligence” and apply a wee bit of “common sense” and figure out that it’s not the dog’s fault when they allow it to run amok. Would you solve your issue with a two year old that is attracted to asphalt by taking her to the country where there aren’t any roads?
Sadly, for the “excellent dog” in this saga (and he certainly has the potential to be an excellent dog), I have to prioritize my time to achieve the goal of making a living, so I don’t have the time to council his owner. I have found that, mostly, I end up feeling guilting for not taking the guy’s dog off his hands, rather than convincing the guy that his dog deserves better - and not for lack of trying or a decent ability to communicate. I have made that call a few dozen times before and learned that it is almost always a fruitless endeavor. It usually lasts no less than 45 minutes (and with a guy who can run out my answering machine memory – it would probably be longer). Of course, the call is always on my dime. Often, I have to be rude to make my point. I don’t really like being rude. But, sometimes the only way to make a point is to make the point. It’s just plain stressful to have those conversations.
Unfortunately, I do not have the resources to save every dog from every stupid person in the world. I have to decide whether there’s any hope to change the guy’s mind and make him consider professional assistance. I do not run a dog rescue. I have rescued lots of dogs – and usually at my own expense. But, I cannot always do that. Right now, I don’t have the resources to take this “excellent dog” off this guy’s hands, rehabilitate it, probably neuter it and then try to find a home for it. Before I totally threw in the towel, I thought to myself; will this guy come to a One Day Workshop? We have one on Saturday. Then, I go over the tape of his voice, again, and play “profiler” to see whether it’s worth my time to call him back because once I am on the phone with him, I will be subjected to 45 minutes of his sad story and why he cannot erect a fence for his dog, , keep it in his house, or walk it on a leash rather than allow it to run free to “nip people”. If I have to hear one more person tell me, “I don’t believe in keeping dogs in the house”, I will explode.
I decided he would not come to a Workshop, and I knew (at least I was quite certain) he would never dedicate resources to our Board & Train program. He wanted me to take his dog and give it a good home, that’s pretty much what I believe he expected. I profiled him by his area code, the town in which he lives, his accent, the fact that he called his dog a “heeler”, the fact that he thinks the dog needs to “live on a farm” (as if any farmer wants a dog that is going to nip people any more than he wants a dog that nips folks) and a number of other minute details that all rolled up together told me that I do not have the resources to dedicated to him, today. So, I didn’t call him back. I have to make a living training people about how to own dogs, so I didn’t have the time to teach that guy how to own his dog. And, I don’t know if that is a good thing or a bad thing. It is just a thing.